The Iowa Phenomenon

Recently I have discovered what it is about Iowa that has for so long made me dislike it here. Now before all the Iowa locals get up in arms and offended, it's not something inherent in Iowa and is a problem that theoretically could be fixed. Something has bugged me about Iowa for awhile, but I could never really put my finger on it until I started vocalizing some of my dislikes and discovering that there are others who see the same problem I do. The problem that I have taken to calling The Iowa Phenomenon.
You see, it's not Iowa per se that I don't like. The people here are pleasant and the weather is fine and all, and there isn't anything more annoying here really than any place in Texas that is rural. (Small town news broadcasts annoy me) It is in fact the gay population of Iowa that has led me to dislike living here. And now that I have focused on what exactly bugs me, I have discovered there is a vicious cycle going on in Iowa.
Before I can really go into what The Iowa Phenomenon is, I guess I should explain what most gay communities are like. Every community is a little different, but they usually have a variety of groups. (Please note that I am only discussing gay men at this point, and not lesbians.) At the youngest end are twinks. These are guys who are usually between 17 and 23 or so, although they can be older. Their defining characteristics are that they are universally skinny, don't work out, although some might be soccer players and have that very lean look. They are also often more effeminate, but not always, and many have attitude problems. As in they think they are gods gift to mankind. Now this shouldn't be taken to mean that all gay men between the ages 17-23 fit into this group. I would simply say that for that age, the group I described is the most prevalent among those who are out and who go out. That age range is still when many guys are coming out, so there are plenty of regular guys and even muscular guys who are this age, but generally they don't go out as much and often have not come out yet. (please note these are generalizations) Next on the age ladder you have the late 20s, early 30s crowd. This one is I think one of the most diverse. You have many who have gone to college and become professionals, as well as those who didn't do so well and still work at the Gap. This is actually I must say my favorite age range because many are still single, but since they are older and sometimes more mature, they generally know what they want a lot better and play fewer games.
Now this group contains the vast majority of the circuit crowd (those incredibly hot and muscular guys who go to circuit parties and often use recreational drugs and have orgies). But it also contains many who are more into monogamy, are against drugs, etc. Of all the age ranges in the present time, I think this one reflects the diversity in society the best. There really isn't one way to sum up this age range because of that except to say that muscle is much more prevalent and much more desired in this age range. This is also the group that has the most disposable income.
Finally there is the older crowd. This is a hard group to sum up I must say. Because once you begin talking about people in their 40s and 50s, you start encountering those who had to go through the worst of the HIV/AIDS scare of the 1980s. This is a much smaller group than it would be because of the number who have lost their lives to the disease. It is amazing actually when you talk to men in this age range how many have lost a friend or loved one to HIV, something that is almost totally foreign to today's twink crowd. But other than this, really this group normally just reflects the normal aging process of all men.
So this long discourse now brings me to The Iowa Phenomenon. I know you are on the edge of your seats waiting to figure out what it is. The Iowa Phenomenon is something that exists because there are gays missing. If you look at the Iowa gay community, there are plenty of twinks. Especially in Iowa City, but its a college town so that makes sense. There is also a healthy older population in their 40s. It's the middle group, however, that is missing. Gay men in their late 20s and 30s are almost totally absent from the Iowa population. Nowhere will you find circuit goers or young professionals, and thus nowhere will you find the muscular guys. This of course shouldn't be taken to mean that there aren't muscular guys in Iowa, there are plenty of straight ones, and I suspect there are some gay ones too, but they won't come out. In my opinion this is because of what has happened in Iowa from having this void in the population. In any normal gay community, the middle group is usually the most dominant. They are usually the ones who go out on the weekend and the ones who work on Pride Committees and for HRC and such. They are also as noted before the ones with the most disposable income, and thus often set the fashion trends for the community as well as the materialistic ideal. Because they are not present here, however, this has caused the mantle to be taken up by one of the other two remaining groups. In eastern Iowa, this would be the twinks. In Iowa City and Cedar Rapids the community is dominated by the twinks, and twinks are considered hot. I am dragged to amateur strip night which is all twinks all the time, and people cheer for them here. Because it is the definition of hot here, the ego of twinks has ballooned horribly out of proportion and they have bought into the idea that skinny and young is hot and thereby think they own the bars they are at and believe anyone and everyone should want to sleep with them. If you don't it's because you are arrogant and have attitude. In case you can't tell I myself am not a huge fan of twinks no matter their location, so this contributes greatly to my dislike of Iowa.
The result of having this dominant twinks class with so much attitude and often a great deal of effeminant (sp?) men is that other gay guys are hesitant to come out or go out. They stay in the closet, some because they don't want to be identified with those they see outside of Studio or at the Dragon, and others because what they see they don't like so they deny their own homosexuality. Instead they flee Iowa (this is not just a gay thing, the state has a negative population growth) and go to places like Chicago, where they come out, and where, btw, people seem to think guys from Iowa are hot, something I could never figure out until I put this together. Of course the result of the migration out of the state is that the lack of late 20s, early 30s is perpetuated and thus the twinks remain as the dominant group in the Iowa gay community. I'm not sure that Iowa is the only place that this occurs. But it is a unique environment because it is liberal enough to have a gay community, but doesn't have enough to keep the successful gay men from leaving. And so this is The Iowa Phenomenon. The fact that a whole segment of the gay population is missing, resulting in dominance by a group that anywhere else could never claim it, and the glorification of skinny. And people ask why I don't like living in Iowa....

Tulsa?!

So I am actually going to do two blogs today, so I hope you read both. Call it making up for all the time that has passed since I last blogged. This first one is going seem very hetero for me because it has to do with college football. The BCS rankings came out, and there are some very strange results going on here. I'm not normally one of the people who hate on the BCS. I really don't think there is a perfect system. I will say that I think Texas, LSU, and Georgia Tech all got seriously shafted, but my bone to pick has to do with number 25. Now you might be asking, who cares who has the last spot. Well I do. Mainly because I am a Texas A&M fan. And this week we finally broke into the rankings for the season as #23 in the AP poll and #25 in the USA Today poll. But this is somewhat negated by the fact that now that BCS rankings are out, those are the ones everyone will pay attention to. It may be important to note that they changed to formula again, and now the AP poll is no longer part of the BCS. So even though A&M is now ranked, most things won't show us as ranked because we did not make the BCS rankings. That in itself would not totally surprise me. This is our first week afterall, and many things go into the formula. What shocked and appalled me, however, was that #25 in the BCS rankings was given to Tulsa. Tulsa! A Conference USA team with an even worse schedule than A&M, and who hasn't been ranked in any poll all season. Not 1! In fact, the AP and USA Today polls always show below the 25 teams ranked a list of teams who received votes, but not enough to make the rankings. Tulsa has never showed up on the USA Today poll runner up list, and only showed up on the AP poll list this week as the last of 11 teams (they received 1 vote). How does a team who has never been anywhere close to being ranked all season end up as the BCS 25? A&M for the record has at least been in the runner up group all season. And even if A&M didn't get #25, there are about 10 teams more deserving of the spot than Tulsa. Something crazy is going on at the BCS. I wonder what would happen if all the major colleges boycotted.